The Climb

It was time again to load the dishwasher, and being a tiresome task, it always gets me to stick music in my ears to make it bearable. First up, Miley Cyrus- The Climb. Now, I love the song, but I have always had an issue with it. She says that it doesn't matter what's on the other side of the mountain, what matters is the climb! And I always think, "Nonsense girl! Of course it matters, what's on the other side! Else we wouldn't climb at all!" As I distractedly decided what dishes went where (competition for the top rack is keen), I decided I wasn't being fair. Maybe I hadn't given Miley sufficient time to explain herself. I hit 'back' and listened to it again. And I tried to think about my climb. Maybe I haven't climbed far enough yet to really be an expert-after all, I'm probably only a quarter of the way up the mountain. And, what IS on the other side? I don't even know, really. So, what has my climb showed me? A lot of things, when I really think about it. I have learned how important editing is, even though I haven't had a professional editor. A friend and I just read my books-over and over and over and try to comb out every mistake, every inconsistency in my text (bless you Bonnie Findlay!). I have also seen books that have had either little, no or extremely poor editing, and man, I can tell you, keep that stuff off the bookshelves, please, cyber and otherwise. They are actually painful to read. There is absolutely nothing (in reading) like a fine, polished novel, and I never knew that before. I have also learned that I'm not going to fool with agents if I can help it-or I should say, that I am not going to kiss their fine little hinnies to get their attention. If I should happen upon one who wants to take me on, that might be different. I think they are just so inundated with requests that they have to be fussy. I hate the infamous 'query letter' process. All it means to me is that a potentially fabulous manuscript is being dismissed out of hand because my one page query letter wasn't worded in a way that pushed that agent's little buttons. When I looked into Amazon's FREE self publishing service, I decided to try it. If it doesn't work out, if you don't like it, you can unpublish and keep trying with mainstream publishers. But, I found out that I do like it. I like the total control I have over everything. Aside from all this, though, the most important thing I have found out is who I can count on and who I can't. Forgive any misuse of mine of the word 'who' (as opposed to 'whom'). Since I was little kid, I have known the correct usage of 'whom,' but to me it just sounded ridiculous. I have always refused to use the word. Anyway, I digress. I found out who I can count on and who I can't. There are some people, friends and family both, who wouldn't read my book because they don't want to read anything about Mormons. What, are they afraid they might read something that's true that they don't want to think is true? I don't know, and I don't ask them. There is another group, small in number, I hope, who aren't reading it because they have pretty much always been of the opinion that I probably wouldn't make anything of myself, and who am I to think I have the brains to write a book? Those people just aren't bothering to waste their time reading something I wrote (so I can surmise that none of those people are reading this!). There is another group who have found out in the last few months that they don't agree with me politically, and so have not been a support to me. I didn't diss them when I found out that they were liberals, or democrats, or whatever, but I guess they didn't feel the same tolerance. And actually, many liberal democrat friends did NOT do that to me-so, I don't mean you! All of the above might make me sound bitter, but honestly, I'm not. I have been buoyed up by the other people-the ones who have been a support. Who have bought the book, or downloaded it. Or, maybe if they couldn't afford it, downloaded it on the free days, like today and tomorrow (and I know how that is-I am right there with you). Or at the very least, for people who have just continued with the positive comments and pats on the back. Once I found out who I couldn't count on, I found I wasn't even hurt and had very litle trouble basically dismissing them. The ones that count are the ones that have stood by me. The facebook likes, the positive comments, the reviews on Amazon, the ones who have told their friends about me and have recommended my books, the ones who have handed out my blasted bookmarks, read my books, and have tirelessly pre-read those books for me, being experimented on like literary guinea pigs. Thank you Bonnie Findlay and April Elzinga! The first group (we'll call them group S, S for stinky) has actually done me a valuable service. You have to get rid of the dead weight or you'll never make it up the mountain. So, I am looking at Miley's motto in a more favorable light. The destination still matters to me-maybe making the New York Times bestseller list, or dare I hope (probably not)? Oprah's Book Club. But really, it ain't about what's waitin' on the other side. It's the climb.

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I have noticed that the blogs of more experienced authors are often aimed at helping new authors who are learning to navigate through shark infested waters. Some others seem to think that jumping feet first covered with blood into shark infested waters is the best way for a new author to figure out what they're doing. I decided to avoid the sharks as completely as possible. I didn't get an agent and I didn't have publishers breaking down my door. I started out doing the agent thing, query letters, etc., because I didn't know then that there was another way. I found out there were companies that you could hire to publish your book for you. But I, like many people, didn't have the money for that. Then I saw it. Publish free on Amazon. The downside is that while the process was fairly easy, I had to do everything myself. I designed the cover from a template they provided, and I'm sure that could have been done better by someone with more resources than I had. Yet, the cover, I think, turned out pretty good. The interior looks great. I was surprised, actually, by the quality of the service provided by Amazon. Heavy duty laminated paper for the cover, the pages are of excellent quality paper, and the type set looks wonderful. And now I can say I'm published. I wish now that I knew more about marketing. Right now I'm still at the point where I'm telling my friends and hoping that they'll tell their friends and that somehow it will all take off. I'm also going to sign up for Extended Distribution, a service offered by Amazon. That makes the book available to retailers and libraries.

Goodreads reviews for A Little Hair of the Dog

Reviews from Goodreads.com

I'm a published author, officially

Today seems to be an appropriate day for me to write again in my much neglected blog, being the day after my first novel was published! I was so busy writing and re-writing, revising and thinking and also taking care of kids and necessities, that the blog was one of many things that went by the wayside. It's a strange thing having my book out there. It is a great feeling, but also a scary feeling. I feel like I have just put a whole load of my own kindergartners on the bus for the very first time. I created these people, I love these people. They have been my private intellectual property for over two years and now I have sent them out into the world to sink or swim for themselves. I wonder if any other author has ever felt that way? I'm sure they must have. As I wait for people to actually read the book, I have realized that while I do desire that they will like the book (and maybe like me better for having written it), the thing that I'm really worried over is that I want them to like my characters. Ann, the skinny, klutzy heroine; Kyle, the big brooding hero who is, underneath it all, and for the right person, a big teddy bear; Bobby, the gentle giant; and Diesel Taylor-there I stop-no spoilers on Diesel. I have another worry nagging away at me too. It's the Mormon thing. Not that I'm ashamed of it-certainly not. I'm proud to be a Latter day Saint. But I have a lot of friends who are not members of the same Church as me. More than I have who are members, in fact. I don't want anyone to read my book and get the idea that maybe I am looking down on them for the way they live their lives. It has become the norm, for instance, in this world for couples of all ages to live together without being married. We just don't do it. We just don't. But if someone else is doing it, it doesn't phase me. We don't believe in sex before or outside of marriage. Again. People don't seem to be doing that anymore. We don't drink, we tend not to swear and it is my experience that we are generally nice to people. But so are other people generally nice to people. I want to say right now that whether or not you are nice to me is the only thing in that vein that I care about regarding other people. You can be black or white, Democrat or Republican, mixed race, Jewish or Catholic or Lutheran, you can be gay or straight, you can be for gay marriage or against it, you can be married or living together or living in a nudist colony. If you are nice to me, I will be nice to you, and that is the end of it. I know and respect that we are all different. In this story, my main character is a typical Mormon girl. She doesn't look down on anyone, and I don't either (at least I honestly try not to). It is my hope that people will accept the story for just what it is-fun. It's not meant to be a statement for or against anything, except for perhaps an allowance of tolerance for all other people. I'll be the first to admit that in the LDS Church, there are some people who are intolerant of (you fill in the blank). But that is true in any group of people that contains more than two people, and I don't care what that group may be. So, please, read, enjoy, laugh, cry, adopt a dog. I'm having issues posting a link to the book on Amazon. It is called A Little Hair of the Dog, by Jane McBride and is available on Amazon on kindle and in paperback.

A Movie That Made Me Think About Bullies

Here is another one that may seem to have nothing to do with being an author, but the more I think about it, the more I disagree (with myself only, so far). Everything that happens to us influences how we write-whether we write fiction or non-fiction, fantasy or mystery or sci-fi, ultimately we write about our own lives and experiences. I'm watching a movie I've never seen before. It's called Artificial Intelligence. It's about a futuristic civilization that has robots as part of the community. Mostly, I think they're workers. But they decided to make child robots that could love. The first experimental model went to a couple whose son, Martin, was in a coma and unlikely to recover. When they get their child robot, Mom is unsure, but the kid grows on her. They decide to keep him, which involves completing his programming so that he will bond with them, love them only, forever. I'm not sure what he's supposed to do someday when they die. They are quite delighted with him and begin settling in. Just then, their own son wakes up from his coma. I'm at that part of the movie right now, and I have no idea which way they're going to go. Right at the moment, I don't like what I'm seeing, and I'll tell you why. David, the robot child, is so much like William that it's difficult for me to watch this movie. He's very curious about everything, but understands little. He mimicks their movements-he doesn't eat, but watches them while they eat and pretends he is eating and drinking too. He is extremely gullible and believes everything he is told. I have just updated to include pictures-one from the movie of Haley Joel Osmont, who played David, and one of our William. They even look just alike, right down to their hair color and the little forehead cowlick that makes the little triangle shaped void in their bangs. The resemblance wasn't lost on me. Everything changes for David when Demon Child Martin comes home. Martin, having the true nature of a bully, immediately begins zeroing in on David's weaknesses. His curiosity becomes a weakness. His programmed love for his parents becomes a weakness when Martin tricks him into doing things that are wrong, telling him his parents will love him if he does these things. Martin makes David eat, knowing it will harm him. Martin tells David to sneak up on Mommy in the middle of the night and cut off a lock of her hair, then she will love him. Mommy and Daddy wake up and mistakenly believe that David was going to hurt Mommy with the scissors. Martin's equally bullying friends come over and test out the possibilities of David's natural defense systems, by purposely cutting him. As his gullibility does not allow him to see Martin for what he really is, he turns to his brother for protection from the other boys. David and Martin fall into the pool and Martin almost drowns. David gets the blame. Parents or educators of autistic children won't need to wonder for very long why these things are bothering me. Autistic children are often victimized in the same ways. I mean, the exact same ways. I have heard more than one story of "normal" kids doing things to harm special needs children who were unable to feel pain. Many autistic kids have problems processing pain. They can get hysterical over a hang nail but something that should usually cause severe pain, like a bad cut or a burn might go unnoticed. I heard a story of an autistic boy who was found with hundreds of cigarette burns all over his body because his "friends" were fascinated with his inability to feel pain. Thinking that they were his friends, he let them do it. We're all taught that our real friends will never hurt us, right? He thought they were his friends and so he let them do it. Bullies often coerce innocent special needs children, even adults, into doing their bidding, doing ridiculous things in public, things that make fools of them, things that will get them into trouble-and of course, afterward, these bullies will know nothing about any of it. I know we aren't really talking about robots here. I'll never know how the movie ended. I decided to quit when, after the pool incident, Mommy takes David out into the woods and leaves him there. The parents couldn't see their "real" son for what he was. The boys had a toy robotic teddy bear that saw what Martin was doing and he tried to help David. Pretty bad when Teddy Ruxpin is smarter and more compassionate than Mom and Dad. Do parents really not teach their kids how they should treat special needs people? My perspective is unique. My oldest child is special needs. I was teaching the world how to treat him. I wasn't wondering how to raise my normal child. I was wondering how to protect my special one. Then we have a second child, and he is raised from birth, realizing that his brother is different and learning how to deal with him just like we do. So tell me, someone tell me. Why do they do it? Is there some natural urge to seek out and prey upon weakness? To press vulnerability? Does it really make their day to send the weird kid into the girl's bathroom when it's full of girls? Do they go home proud of themselves, patting each other on the back over how cool they are? Someone please, tell me what it is. Do they and their parents really think that my son is any less a person than they are, that he is less loved, less important, less intelligent, less able to contribute to society, that he is less anything that is positive and good? The only thing that he is really less is less cruel, less dispassionate, less hateful and less harmful. Please teach your kids how to be compassionate with those that are different. After all, are we not all different? We all have vulnerabilities and quirks. If a society makes it acceptable to victimize the citizens that are most vulnerable, then I cannot be a part of society. Since William's diagnosis almost 9 years ago, I have slowly backed away from society. Some of it is because his behavior in public can make him difficult to handle. But I have come to realize that a lot of the reason for my withdrawal is because the behavior of society is difficult to handle. If you see a special needs child behaving strangely in public, please try to remember that you are not at the zoo. Many special needs children look normal but act strangely. If you see a child acting strangely, even behaving abominably, please don't start whispering behind your hands about how you would handle that kid if he were yours. If he were yours, you would understand. It may or may not be a special needs child that you are looking at, but the point is that you don't know. End of rant.